Songs About Freedom

Hey I never told you people that you can get two of my songs for FREE by clicking the link above! Sweet!

No father? No Father.

CardZen's comment below provoked me. So now I will talk at you. Even more.

Here's something I find hilarious/infuriating (in that kind of wild-eyed way my parents occasionally took some satisfaction from a robust, well-deserved whipping--that's what we called them), and you find it ALL OVER the religious constructs: Guy cheats on family by giving himself to his job as a marketing director. He wants to please his boss instead of God and wife, so he puts in the time and is accepted in that forum. We would say about this man that he is a lout. He is a selfish oaf with vain ambitions. We are, of course, correct.

Now put this same performer/pleaser/ambitio (just made that up) into a religious system. Say he's an... oh, I don't know... he's a... Youth Minister (shall we?). He puts in his regular time at the office, like everybody else, but he also has evening Bible study groups, Wednesday pizza-and-prayer events, Friday night "Fifth Quarters" (come on, shout out!), Saturday mission emphasis or car washes or open gym or somesuch. Sundays he's totally on call. Of this man, unlike the marketer, we say he's a good man, he's doing The LORD's Work, and is making his sacrifices for the Kingdom.

Really?


I Timothy 3:4-5 [Any would-be overseer of the Kingdom or the Church] must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect. (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God's church?)

Titus 1:6-8 An elder must be blameless, the husband of but one wife, a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient. Since an overseer is entrusted with God's work, he must be blameless—not overbearing, not quick-tempered, not given to drunkenness, not violent, not pursuing dishonest gain. Rather he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined.


In both descriptions of overseers/elders/'pillars', the home life is what's under First and Preeminent Scrutiny. So the questions, Biblically, of all would-be pillars are something like, "What kind of a husband is he? What kind of a dad is he? Are the wife and kids secure and well-looked after? Is the wife kind of a Prov 31 girl--laughing at the future, because she's been led by quiet waters and her soul's constantly being restored?"

But excuses are given, again, for the religious worker: "He's accepted a higher calling. He's chosen a difficult and unusual path, and much will be required of his relationship with his spouse because of it." yeah, JUST SHOW ME THAT IN THE BIBLE. Didi had more than one woman approach her when I accepted my present job, and the woman said, "I have a husband who works there. It's very hard on the wives, so I understand. I'm willing to meet with you in a support group kind of way..." Didi looked at her stunned and horrified (like when you see a kid in the desk right beside you just barf all over everything and THAT BARF IS PINK AND GREEN!), and assured that woman that li'l Stevie would leave the premesis post-hastily if his marriage was damaged at all by the organization. And here's why:

ACCORDING TO THE ABOVE PASSAGES, IF YOUR FAMILY DOESN'T EXPERIENCE THE FULL AND UNQUALIFIED BLESSING OF YOUR GODLY LEADERSHIP, YOU ARE UNQUALIFIED TO EXERT YOURSELF UPON THE BRIDE OF THE LORD JESUS.

I find it all to be quite simple. This fact has been levied at me as an accusation several times, though, so I grant you the pleasure of disagreeing with my read of said scriptures.

Carry on...

Religious-flavored Vomitings From Me

I am confounded by the advent of the Religious Organization. It gives me much cause for thought. It is surely one of the most common vehicles for deception that the enemy’s ever devised, and millions of my precious brothers are caught in its bowels. So I think about it, and pray about it. And sometimes write about it.

I’m sure that religious organizations aren’t the church. As I think I’ve said here before, the Church, the bride of Jesus, is a living organism (like, if you will, a body). There is a naturally occurring government in operation there, and it requires no formal/structural input to keep it going. By virtue of the fact that organizations have to keep themselves going, have to maintain, have to inspire (or threaten) allegiance and support, I know that the organization isn’t the church. The church, of course, is eternal and indestructible, and will always advance until the day She’s ready for her Wedding Day. Mmmm.

Having so much experience these days with a religious organization, though, I find it helpful to talk it out for myself. That’s the kind of thing you’ll find below.

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There’s a cleverly placed confusion in the bowels of religious organizations, and it has to do with the nature of an employee’s enlistment. On the one hand, we’re told, “Remember, at the end of the day, this is a job, and you’re here to do your job. So do your job.” This is all well and good, and anyone with a natural work ethic is happy to live under those expectations. Then, though, we’re told (when it serves the organization to say this), “We are brothers and sisters. We are a family. We are the Church.”

This strikes me as funny for a couple of reasons. First of all, I’m a firm believer that there’s just one church, and it spans the globe. Whenever there’s a one-to-one comparison between the local organization and The Church, I chafe. Even saying, “The church that meets here at First Blessed Union of Centerville” is preferable to me. It’s that ‘we ARE the church’ thing that gives me the shakes. The church is always bigger than us, and I think we do well to remember that, and let our language reflect that.

Secondly, this kind of ‘we are family’ talk reminds me of when my wife worked, for 10 years, in the American corporate system. She was told by bosses, countless emails, and even in health benefits packages that came in the mail, “Campbell’s Soup employees are a FAMILY. We care about our employees.” And, you know, okay. That goes down a little smoother than, “You people are here to make us money, and as long as you do, let’s be friendly.” But the fact is… the employees are there to make the company money, and as long as they do, the corporation will be friendly with you. My wife was a Producer, so she was regularly given tokens like $50 travelers’ checks. This would delight my wife and make her feel appreciated, but I would remind her that she was being given 50 bucks because she made 2 million dollars for Campbell’s in the last quarter. And let it be said that, since leaving the corporation 6 months ago, the ‘family’ hasn’t yet given her a phone call. What family kicks you out if you don’t contribute to the bottom line? Not a good one.

To me, family talk should be reserved for actual families and the Church, which is Christ’s body. In that body, you see spiritual fathers laying down their lives for their immature spiritual sons; wise mothers looking after newly wed daughters; young people being raised up to assume responsibility and walk in wisdom. That’s the appropriate venue for "family" talk. Family involves sacrifice from the top down, isn't motivated by any factor other than the common good, and entails unconditional love. An organization is mute and deaf on these points; it is ignorant of them, in a way, and that’s fine.


There’s a corporate spirit (and by that, I mean the unclean spirit that inhabits a corporation) that encourages employees to find identity in their work. This is great for the corporation, but terrible for the employees. What happens when they’re no longer in The Family, when their business identity goes away? The corporate spirit knows that the more personal an employee’s affiliation is with their job, the harder they’ll work—because more is on the line. I don’t deny that this is better for the bottom line; I just deny that it’s a responsible thing to do with a human heart.

To me, business leaders should be up-front about their relationships with employees. “You’re here to do a job, and you’ll be judged by the quality of your work. You’re not here because you’re an enjoyable person, or get along well with others. You’re here because of the job you can do. While you do your job, though, we want to be congenial and friendly. There IS a corporate culture that we care about, and we want that preserved and even furthered by you. But if you make the culture great, but don’t do your work, you’re gone. That isn’t personal; that’s business. This isn’t personal, either—we’re not here to have friendships; we’re here to do our jobs.”

That may sound cold, but to me it’s got more integrity than the spiritual guilt game that religious leaders foist upon their staffs: “This is a big month for us around here, so pray for God’s grace to endure this heavy workload.” “Your family lives will be stressed during this next Season of Ministry [love that one], but remember that you’re making these sacrifices for the Kingdom of God.” There it is again, that one-to-one overlap between the organization and the Church. With these quotes, a worker is left to wonder, “If I don’t get it done during this next run, did I fail in my effort or skills, or is God Himself disappointed in me? Are there eternal consequences in my not hitting my numbers this month? Or is God Himself to blame, since I did pray about this?” It’s all very convoluted.

I want those things permanently separated for people. I want people to know that you don’t work for the Kingdom of God when you’re on the clock; you work for a mid-sized non-profit organization, and you will be judged by that standard. When we sit down for year-end reviews, we’ll not be talking about your prayer life or encouraging emails or your spiritual maturity; we’ll be talking about job performance.

This isn’t to say that there can be no spiritual content in your work. If you have a co-worker stop by your cubicle who needs prayer or a shoulder to lean on, I’d give you the same advice I’d give a friend who works at P&G: make sure to re-arrange your schedule for this person and show them the love of God. I would say this to you not as an employee, but as a fellow believer. I would even give this advice to people who work for me, but I would be giving them that advice as a friend and brother in Christ, not as an employer. Because if you take care of the people around you all the time and don’t get your job done, the employer (me) will fire you, and the brother in Christ (someone else) will chastise you for not doing an excellent job in your work.


Now, there IS a unique thing in religious organizations, in that several people on the staff are being paid to teach the Bible, or to have relationships that mature people in their faith—that is, they’re being paid to exercise their giftings, which don’t technically belong to the organization, but to the Body of Christ (again, a worldwide entity). Weird, indeed. In this case, the employer can say, “The requirements of Titus 1 and I Timothy 3 are also your job requirements. Maintain this lifestyle or be gone. That is your job description, along with whatever responsibilities we negotiate.” To me, that feels like the Biblical model of shepherding, where a man watches after my soul and, as I feel the benefits of his service to me, I tithe to that man. If I don’t realize any benefits from our relationship, or something happens to that relationship, the tithe naturally ends as well. That would be, in effect, my ‘firing’ him, and him losing his salary. I would also say, though, that if such a thing were to happen, and I felt called into relationship with that guy in the first place, my relationship had better not end with him when he’s no longer on the staff. For that one I will not answer to First Blessed Union, I will answer to God, a la Matthew 18. Again, the kingdom relationship is different than the organizational relationship.

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A word here, too, about the kind of organizational culture I’d want to encourage, which would be one of creativity above everything else (how’s that sit, by the way? ‘Godliness’ is not the thing I’d put at the top of the list, for instance. I don’t believe that the Kingdom of God can be administrated, so I don’t want to endeavor that at all. I’d rather just have a really good business), and so would have to prize freedom, unpredictability, and health. That being the case, I would want to tout those employees who have a commendable work/family balance, who’re involved in outside hobbies, etc.—because those things foster creativity. I would be miffed by employees for whom their job is their life, because that sort of thing quashes creativity and wholeness.

When a corporation prizes those who are heroically overworked in stress-filled jobs, a siren song whispers to everyone else in the organization: Make your job difficult, stretch yourself thin, stress yourself out and eventually you, too, may be honored with executive approval. If you desire the blessing of the Mighty Corporate Fathers: work longer hours (than is sensible); take on more responsibility (than is sensible); make your job harder (than is sensible). Do this, and your sacrifices will be celebrated and your worth confirmed.
- Gordon MacKenzie, Orbiting the Giant Hairball

I want to be able to look my employer in the eye and say, “You love me because of my performance, and that’s fine. I give you eight hours of my day, and you give me an agreed upon/negotiated wage for my life hours spent. This is how God chooses to provide for my needs. I’ll do a great job for you because I work for God really, and only coincidentally work for you. You get eight hours of good hard work and that’s it. I’m not romantically tied to you; I don't need your affirmation, or even respect—though it is appreciated. You can have my time and energy but you don't get my soul—in any way. It’s already committed elsewhere; it isn't even mine to give you any longer.”



How about that deal in R.O.s where they call everything ‘ministry’? What’s up with that? They say, ‘if you do something for us, it’s just like you’re ministering to God.’

I guess what I’m after is a religious organization that looks less religious. I have much more comfort with ‘humanitarian organization’ and ‘non-profit business’ than ‘local church’. If you’re a local extension of the Church, your first order of business is finding your apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors, and teachers, and you are not to do any ministering yourself, but are to equip everybody else to do the ministering. You’re also supposed to teach everybody how to suffer, and think about holding all your possessions in common. I personally doubt whether you could sustain an organization that makes those things its modus operandi. God could, sure. But on paper, with brick and mortar and paychecks, no, I doubt it.

Organization? Hooray! Deception? Boo! Structure? Hooray! Coercion? Boo!


Wouldn’t it be great if there was an organization that was investing so much into poor, forgotten communities that it was changing their fabric, yielding poverty bankrupt itself, removing desperation from criminals, and neutralizing the greatest factor in family dissolution (money)? Wouldn’t it be great if there was an organization that was leading the way in its local setting in the way of creativity, speaking truth to power, and supporting and connecting people trapped in all sorts of religion? Wouldn’t it be great if there was an organization that was welcoming to all those who didn’t help it to run, that was profitable so that more could be given away, and that was taking a serious swipe at influencing the hope, humility, compassion, and even politics of its sphere of influence? This kind of organization would be confused with the church of Jesus. But wouldn’t it be great if that organization said no, we’re not the Church. The church cannot be harnessed by an organization. We long to be part of it, and we long to see it, but It is not us.

That would be mysterious and marvelous.

Same Guy.

Big One

Won.

AWESOME board game

Tell me this doesn't look like a total hoot. I hope they can get this on the US market soon. I would LOVE to play this with some of my colleagues.

Here's the exhaustive list of great basketball teams right now.

Phoenix Suns
Dallas Mavericks.

This is a public service.

When Good Enough Doesn't Happen

Jiff, Cardzen, Hamster and myself have spent wildly varying amounts of time with a people-loving outfit in Missouri called Camp Barnabas. The place is big in the love category, and somewhat less big in the overall professionalism/excellence category. Jiff and myself had a running joke that the bathrooms there were seen as 'clean' when they were 'wet'. Hose out the whole place and PRESTO! Sanitary!

This disturbed me.

But it's a growing trend in minimalism. I come from a Baptist background where we're all thorough and exacting, and I often retain that mindset of high expectations (some call this 'perfectionism', but those people haven't gotten it *quite* right yet). Today, my lash comes out for this trend:

Not-Actual-Handsoap,-Just-Lots-Of-Suds

This is a sigh-inducing drag for me. I got the oily all-day hands, I go in for a refreshing wash, and I don't get the rich, moisturizing lather I anticipate. Instead, I get somebody else's r-u-n-n-o-f-t suds. Leftovers. Somebody ELSE had the pleasure of luxuriating their hands in dense soapy power then I only got the consequences. Thin, inured consequences. This is comparable to my collegiate laziness when I'd shampoo my hair then sort of spread the r-u-n-n-o-f-t all over my body and call that a shower. That's not clean; that's sudsy. Like a just-poured beer, or the edges of a marsh. Or a camel's lower lip.


This trend is growing. I not only get this at the airport now, but also in restaurants, and also in my gym, which is a morass of disappointing and problematic decisions.

So hey, hand soap lovers out there! Give yourself an extra pump of Jergen's today, and think of the good times. I suggest you enjoy it while you can... The world of personal cleansing is becoming Barnabasized.







ALSO, THIS: Because it's a rarity for me, I take great pleasure showering during the day and not using electric lights.

SPIDERS ON DRUGS!

I am a nature lover. I learned this from my dad, who was always watching some nature show or reading some book about polar bears or identifying rare birds (he's really good at that!). I thought this was interesting and disturbing, too.

Same Guy.

I can't see Ben Wallace (like I will next weekend, as the Bulls face off against the Little Mavs. I'll be there, with my friend little Robbie Pratt, at the United Center in Chicago) without imagining Mr. Eko's voice:

"I'm so-rry, Mis-tah Skiles, but to-day I cannot play. My back, you see, is so-ah."

We have it now.

TOLD YOU this was coming, man. TOLD YOU.

Welcome, future. Make yourself at home.

Today's definition

Love-

The power to lay power down.


Today's definiton has been brought to you by Peter Heitt, who has some totally boss definitions.

And by Cream O' Wheat, which reminds you that "Health authorities urge a hot cereal breakfast."

She's no mirage, baby.

When something unexpected makes me cry, I want to tell my friends about it.

Proverbs 2 says:

[Wisdom] will save you also from the adulteress,
from the wayward wife with her seductive words,
who has left the partner of her youth
and ignored the covenant she made before God.
For her house leads down to death
and her paths to the spirits of the dead.
None who go to her return...


I was hit sideways today by a song that I've heard three more times and have yet to hear it without crying. It's just perfect. It's by a fairly unknown artist named Griffin House who's a friend of Andrew's. He has an unreleased album called "Homecoming" and this song is on it. You should buy the song when it becomes available on iTunes, but for now let me give you some of the lyrics...

you can travel down your roads of fantasy and wonder
let each and every beauty pillage, rape and plunder
the pure and golden treasure buried underneath your breast
is covered in the muck that used indulgences to test

She loves to see it shine
She loves when you come down
From where you sit so high
On your head, a crystal crown

She's a mirage! She's an idol! She's not real!
Remove her from your mind and you will see
She's a mirage! She's a liar! She won't heal you!
She will try to come between you and me!

You can spend your strength on women
On those who ruin kingdoms
The unfaithful will be torn from the land
For the trouble they will bring them

Her house leads down to death
Her charm's an evil force
The ties that tie you to the flesh
Will sever in divorce

She's a mirage! She's an idol! She's not real!
Remove her from your mind and you will see
She's a mirage! She's a liar! She won't heal you!
She will try to come between you and me!

Take her down from your pedestal
There's no use anymore
You will recognize the face of death
It fooled you once before
She will find herself disgusted
As she's lying on the floor
Look how vanity has led you where
The road turns into dark despair
I hope I never see you there
Forgive me, darling, for being unaware...

You're no mirage! You're nothing of the kind!
You're noble! You're wise and you are pure!
A good woman is the hardest thing to find!
If there's anything I know, of this I'm sure

Proverbs 31 talks about the ideal, God-fearing woman. If you ask me, and it's the reason I get verklempt when I hear this song, the Most Ideal woman is the perfect Bride of the LORD. And she needs talking to like this song does. In spite of how she may act, this is how she really is:

do not spend your strength on women,
your vigor on those who ruin kings...

A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies...
She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:

"Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.


Yes! Yes! Give her praise! The bride of my master is to be honored by me! She is to be defended against liars and theives and religion and filthiness! She is to be honored when she does right, and she is to be prophesied to about who she's becoming! Yes yes!

Yes!

Snowtorch

I live in Cincinnati, Ohio, where it's 65 degrees on January 5. The world is definitely coming to an end. I know he thinks the theory of global warming is complete hoo-ha, so what's Rush Limbaugh saying about this "winter"? Anybody know?
All I know is that the world's coming to an end. Say your prayers, children.

Panic! At the checkout

I know something about malls. When I lived for a short time in Nashville, I worked at Champs Sporting Goods. I know exactly what it feels like to be trapped inside all that polished marble and professionally tended-to landscaping and look longingly at people exiting the temperature-controlled museum of capitalism. On slow days (and that's mostly when I worked), you were simply a puppy at the pound, hoping that people would find the window displays attractive and come in for a look around. It was desperate and pathetic and I permanently smelled like my synthetic uniform. Yuck.

What I'm saying is, I sympathize with the tedium.

But today, when I went into my local Dick's Sports (I know, I know, just leave it alone. They're based in Pittsburgh and they actually do quite well.), my sympathy contended with my comsumer rights, and lost in the struggle. It went down like this here:

I had an item and a couple of questions. The sign by the register was lit and there was a guy there. So I walked up. I found, as I neared the register, that a young (20?) black guy was working there and (oh boy)... he was on the phone with a friend--the real obvious, go nowhere chit-chat phone call. I have little patience for the worker on the personal call, between you and me: I loathe it as a customer, and I resent it on behalf of the employer. If you're being paid to work, work. Do your job. Instant peeve.

When I walked up, though, this kid not only didn't hang up the phone, he didn't remove it from his neck/shoulder. He simply glanced up at me and said "I can get you here." This was his friend's cue to 'hang on just a second while I deal with this dork right quick so we can get on with our awesome conversation.'

Here is where I made a decision. I could just go along with his style, acting like this was acceptable to me. I could decide I didn't like what I saw, and just melt back into the camping aisle. Or I could speak up. Had I thought it over for a moment, I'm sure I'd have been more gracious and patient and played along. I did not think it over for a moment. I spoke immediately.

Looking blankly at him, as if I were maybe disappointed in him or at least unimpressed, I implored him. "Could you put the phone down?"

That got his attention.

He stared up at me for a moment, seeing if this was some sort of joke. For some reason, I was completely unwilling to let him off the hook in any way. I just stood there with this "I mean, come ON" look on my face. I think he thought there was a twinge of Michael Douglas in Falling Down in me (and maybe there was! maybe there was!), and he slowly put the phone down, and from there on treated me with not only respect, but friendliness. I was friendly too.

So yeah, it ended good. But I walked away with that feeling I have every once in a while, knowing I voilated some small American norm. It's kind of exciting when that kind of thing happens. And if it were me chatting to a buddy behind that register, I'd be grateful for anything breaking up the monotony.

Traveling Mercies!

I have been away from my home for a while now. But I am back. This means I'm up and typing again. And here's what I've learned:

1) In spite of the fact that it's as self-evident as a mole on your nose that the human body is most comfortable somewhere in the 72-degree realm, PEOPLE VARY WILDLY IN THEIR HOMES' TEMPERATURES. I don't know why. They're either in the 67-degree deep-freeze of our friends Matt and Cary, or they're in the 75-degree rotesserie of my inlaws (and these people live in sweltering Dallas, no less). Humans, unite. Our bodies are all basically alike. Put it on 72 and move on. It's not difficult.

*I caveat my own rule here by pointing out, before my wife sneaks on here and does it for me, that we often have our heat on 69 in my home, since we have old, drafty windows and doors and winter typically lasts 5 months around here in the teens. So I push the boundaries on that. But in this weather?! It's 55 degrees outside! That's nice October weather! Pump it up, homeboy--just like that!

2) Towels were invented not primarily to remain color-fast for years, nor for being smooth to the touch, nor even for (watch this, ladies) coordinating with your bathroom decor. They were primarily invented for DRYING OFF YOUR BUTT WHEN YOU LEAVE THE SHOWER. So WHY do people persist with this nylon/lycra/polyester blend stuff that merely smears water around your body without drying you off? I'll throw in here that I have this problem in fancy hotels (and homes) FAR more often than in the practical, can-do environs of the blue collar set. The cheapest, thinnest towels we used for 10th grade basketball were made of COTTON, so they actually absorbed water, thus outperforming the Suave, Silky Nonsense Rags of the luxury bathroom. I mean, please.

3) I can get either nauseated (inlaws) or inspired (Douglasses) by the homes I'm in. After leaving Mark's pad, I wanted to write music, or a book. Seriously. He's done so much good, creative work on that place that I want to slap him on the back and design sneakers with the guy. He's thrown away so much old trash that keeps a home from being beautiful (including nonsense walls), and added so many nice touches (the tile in the half bath!) that you just feel clean and good-looking by standing in the home. Now that says something to me. I'm going to try to apply this lesson somewheres.

4) Be it ever so humble, there's no place like home.