Here's what you get when you sell out

Peepee Gooseman ("the Junkyard Swan") forwarded this bizarre chart to me. What it says, basically, is that if you're 'religious' (and that's defined by people reporting, in a relatively small study, that 'religion is important to them', and not much else), you're going to end up poor. Now, this could be seen as "poor people turn to religion in their need", which is sociologically viable, but it could also be seen as "getting into bed with religion somehow goes hand in hand with getting into bed with poverty", and that's what I'd like to discuss. Even if the chart is bunk (and I'm not putting a ton of stock in it), it piqued my thoughts. Maybe I've communicated what's below before, but it bears repeating:

When in Nigeria (the most religious place I HAVE EVER SEEN, if you don't remember my writing about it last summer), I came across a guy who told me very matter-of-fact that the reason Nigeria was such a poor country was because of its religious context. My ears immediately perked up and I asked him (the man's name is Jarlot) what he meant. "It's right there in the Bible," he said.

"Psalm 133 clearly states that when the brothers dwell together in unity, God likes and sends a blessing. And we know that one of the goals of religion is division on massive scales. So where there is religion, division comes. Where there is division, there is no unity. God's blessing is revoked: poverty." He said it like it was single-digit addition.

Also, according to this chart, America clearly has a religious hangover from the last "great awakening".

In Time, All Things Change

if this proves anything, it's this: with paciencia, everyone's beard will eventually fill out. " Just wait, my comrades, only wait."

The Thrown Out and The Never Should Have Possessed

I have often freely, and without provocation, dispensed marriage advice. This is ENGAGEMENT advice, because it could never apply to a sane married person. This is for free, and this is fo real: DON'T EVER GIVE IN TO THE IMAGINED PRESSURE TO INCLUDE A 'SALAD SHOOTER' IN YOUR GIFT REGISTRY. This is the most insane possible use of your well-wishers' goodwill. I don't believe we ever used our Salad Shooter, once, and I don't know of anybody who's ever used one. We simply acquire them and store them with the maddening melange of tupperware-related plastic storage. (Man, do I hate THAT cabinet.) The design demons at OXO (their products are so alluring! So form-meets-function! So grippy!) will pull the wool over your eyes at some point in the Wedding Registry process; there's no escaping that. But don't let them play you on the salad tip. Consider this... your last warning.

Also, is it wrong that I just threw out my The Call's Greatest Hits CD?

E'erbody...

Go read Peb's new comment on "Why Christianity Hates the Gospel." It's goooooooood.

The Mayor of Goobtown!

Racquetball is the gap-toothed stepson of the Health Club Movement from the 80s: two otherwise normal people gear up (gear can be cool, like when you put on a fireman's uniform, and it can be Completely Ridiculous, like when you put on knee pads and sport goggles for racquetball), lock themselves in a tiny room, and flail at a bouncy ball for an hour. Health clubs featured this 'sport' because their overhead was low (required of the clubs: a room), and it looked good on the floorplan. Variations were created (we played Wallyball in college, which was volleyball where ricochets off the wall were allowed; this was fun), but it's the straight racquetball that's endured.

I took racquetball in college. Cool factor 10. Trust me.

And I've played weekly with my friend Johnathan Thornberry (Kentucky) for the past 3+ years. It's easy to accomplish, and I end up sweaty at the end, so there you go.

While playing with Shane/musrat 2 weeks ago, though, I realized an astounding fact. Now, you have to know that I am dependent on the drop shot. The feebly hit ball to the corner, which then dies, leaving my opponents no recourse, is a friend of mine. I need it. I use it. This is a regular part of my game. Left corner, right corner, whatever it takes. I'll be there.

What I realized while playing with Shane was that I have had VERY strange connotations for those 'kill corners' (my term) over the past few years. My brain has developed ways of thinking about those corners, but I've never articulated it, or even admitted it to myself. My brain would simply make a comment if I, for instance, used the right corner, then I would let that thought pass without examination, and go on. I was stunned when I brought those connotations out into the light and admitted them to Shane. We were both amazed: I have developed a consideration for the right corner as "blueberry" and the left corner as "mango/pina colada/tropical flavors".

I have NO CLUE what this means except that I have done the impossible by increasing the Nerd Factor of racquetball. Color me ambitious.

Public Notice

If anyone's interested in the following items:

Tom Hanks is Forrest Gump (VHS)

Steven Spielburg's Biography (dubbed, with commercials, from A&E, circa '97) (VHS)

Mansfield Park (VHS) (Can't really tell you about this film. It's Girl Art, so I never really ventured out there.)

Late For Dinner (VHS) Now THIS is a gem! A young Peter Berg co-stars as Marcia Hardin's mentally handicapped brother in this romantic sci-fi drama set in the 60s/90s! What a wild ride!

Sting's All This Time (VHS) Watch Sting look smug. Again!

24, Season 1 (DVD) What were any of us thinking? Had we forgotten MacGyver so easily?


they can be easily retrieved from the large green trash can at 2720 Hyde Park Ave.
Cleaning ALWAYS puts a smile on my face. Cleaning out old art is a parTICular joy.